


Die from a broken heart

by Angelssavior



Series: 9-1-1 one shots [2]
Category: 9-1-1 (TV), 9-1-1: Lone Star (TV 2020)
Genre: Angst and Feels, Blood and Injury, Break Up, Drugs, Loneliness, Mental Anguish, Mental Breakdown, Mental Health Issues, One Big Happy Family, One Shot, One Shot Song Challenge, Past Relationship(s), Ratings: R, Sad with a Happy Ending, Suicide Attempt, Suicide Notes, Texas, The Author Regrets Nothing, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, Title from a Country Song
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-05
Updated: 2020-04-05
Packaged: 2021-02-28 18:06:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,171
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23491393
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Angelssavior/pseuds/Angelssavior
Summary: A 911 call comes in that teaches these Lone Star fire and rescue that not all people are perfect. It also teaches them that even the prettiest smiles hide the darkest demons and shoves them into perspective of mental illness.Warnings: Talk of suicide, suicide attempt, blood,
Series: 9-1-1 one shots [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1697125
Kudos: 16





	Die from a broken heart

"9-1-1 what's your emergency?" Said the female voice.

"Hey Grace, can you send the team? I can't do this anymore... I'm..." My voice cracked as I began to cry and took a shaky breath as confusion filled her voice.

"Alice? Talk to me honey, tell me what's the matter..." Concern filled her voice along with worry.

"If I die before they get here, there's letters for each of them. One will be for you. I'm sorry Grace..."

\---------------------------------------  
( 2 weeks before)

"So that's it? You're leaving, just like that? What the hell is wrong with you Buck?"

"I don't love you anymore okay?! I hate you! I don't wanna be with you anymore. It's just not working out between us!" 

We had been arguing for a while now, and all of a sudden he was throwing in the towel. He had surprised me with a visit and it had turned to shit. We were currently standing in the bedroom, arguing when we broke up. Shock, and confusion filled my face as he left after packing his bag, and slammed the door shut. I winced as I followed behind and locked the door. Closing all the blinds, I threw a glass across the room in anger and screamed loudly in anger and heart break. I had lived in my very own house so the neighbors couldn't hear me, thank god.

My days soon were filled with hiding away from the world, my car in the garage with the door closed and not showing up for work. My phone kept ringing and vibrating from various calls and text messages. My boss had texted me and said my job would be waiting for me when I was ready to come back. 

Knocks soon filled the air, with different voices filling the air but I continued to keep the lights off, with no signs of life in my house. I laid in the dark, glass filled the ground. My house looked like a war zone and a bomb had gone off. Letters were written to the 126 that I had called home and to Grace. 

\-------------------------------

"What's there to talk about? I can't do this anymore... I'm sorry Grace."

Hanging up the phone, I stripped myself of my clothes except for my bra and underwear. I sat in the tub, thw water running, the box razor on the edge of the tub. I had cut my waist long platinum blonde hair short and I sank in the tub. The letters on the kitchen table, anx I took the dosage of what was left in the small orange pill bottle and one by one crimson color filled my skin from lashes I marked on my skin. The sound of the door being slammed open and voices filling the air, few moments later as I slipped into darkness.

\---------------------------------

It was the beeping that woke me up. The restraints restricted my movements and I winced in pain. Opening my eyes, I immediately closed them again from the bright lights. Waking up, I saw Judd sleeping holding my hand and I smiled softly as I slowly placed a hand on his cheek. He stirred and woke up, a smile plastered on his face as he began to cry. Touching his face, he hugged me and I winced softly.

"Shit, you scared us half to death. What the hell were you thinking? Trying to kill yourself like that?"

We sat in silence because I didn't know how to answer. Judd sighed softly as he took my hand and kissed my hand softly, as I began to cry. He knew I had mentally broke down and was mentally broken.

"When we saw the blood, and the pill bottle... I didn't know what to think. Tk blames himself for not seeing the signs, Michelle thinks she should have tried harder..." He stopped and swallowed thickly.

"Judd... I made that desicion in a heart beat. I wanted to die because I couldn't deal with Buck breaking up with me, me losing my family, and you guys.... I thought you guys hated me because you forgot my birthday," my voice shaky, my body ached and I took a deep breath.

"We didn't forget honey, we were planning a surprise birthday party for you, and we were gonna have Buck and Maddie and everyone else come. We were just trying to distract you from the fire house so you could enjoy your birthday."

\-----------------------------

We sat in my house, after Marjan took the time to clean it with Owen and TK. The door to the bathroom and my front door had been repaired and I wore a tank top and sweatpants, my arms still wrapped in bandages. TK sat across from me and I laid on Judd, still exhausted from being released from the hospital, and being on new meds. He held me close and kissed the top of my head, as we sat in silence. They had all read the letters and felt like they were to blame.

Michelle wasn't new to the whole mental illness aspect but yet still wasn't sure of what to make of it. Owen and I had have our deep conversations and should've listened more carefully and TK felt like he was to blame because he was to busy hanging with Carlos. Marjan, Paul and Mateo should've known something was up when I shoved some stuff on them that I didn't need. Makeup for Marjan, audio books for Mateo, and workout equipment and a self guide of being friends with a trans person.

They were all new to the whole mental illness aspect of me and it was a side they had never seen, let alone discuss. Judd and Grace had received a whole bunch of christian music cd's to donate to the church. Something they didn't get often and were grateful for. Grace sat at my feet as Judd held me close to him, thanking god I was alive and wanting to kill Buck for hurting me. 

"How you holding up?" Asked Michelle, as she placed food in front of me that I didn't touch. 

"Okay, I guess. The meds are making my sleep schedule out of wack, so I'm feeling like an insomniac. Plus they are making me wanna throw up and not wanting to eat. The therapist I've been seeing says this maybe a hiccup in the road, but the progress I've made so far is wonderful. She says the new meds may take time to adjust but she had to wean me off the old ones first before giving me new ones."

"That's good at least. What Bobby and Athena have to say about it?" Asked Carlos and I shrugged.

"I'm not ready for that talk yet. I love everyone at the 118 but honestly... I don't know anymore. Just to many memories with Buck there. I mean I messaged Bo by and explained to him what happened, just not the whole truth, and he said he would knock some sense into Buck. I..." Trailing off, they understood.


End file.
